Being scared


Back to this blog after a one week break, or something.

Last week at this time I was in the midst of regrouting the master bathroom shower (I know, it’s as exciting as it sounds) when I got the call that I had a job interview. For a guy whose only source of income after being turfed is the occasional (very occasional; hire me) freelance work, this was good news. And better news because it is in my industry, with the chance to combine writing with social media. And it is local. So, as disappointed as I was, the grouting had to take a back seat.

I was told that the interview involved a presentation. Yup, an actual presentation where I had to speak. In front of people. I know, I’m scared, too. I don’t speak in front of people if I can find a way to get out of it. Or fake an illness. I spoke at my wedding reception, but believe me, I didn’t want to. Not really possible to fake an illness that day, or a heart attack either. Just my luck.

I’m a writer, not a speaker. So it was either decline the interview or, if I want to work in public relations again, it’s time to push the envelope. I’m nothing if not a pusher. I have to make money somehow. In the last week I felt like dealer as I’ve done two cash transactions for toys in the parking lot of a Starbucks. Reselling toys is a lucrative deal.

Back to the interview. It was time to step outside that comfort zone. It’s scary, but I recommend it. Now I know, I’m probably the last person that should be giving motivational advice, but you know, it’s my blog. So if you are presented with a chance to push yourself, to learn, to grow as a person, or other sappy crap, do it.

I worked my ass off preparing for the interview, making a presentation, rehearsing, rehearsing again, freaking out, preparing, freaking out again. Well I made it through the interview without passing out and wouldn’t you know it, I did really well, dammit. And I was told, “You’ve set the bar high.” Well shit. That’s a first.

You know the saying, “Do one thing every day that scares you.” Fuck that. Do a thing once a year that scares me, maybe. That once a day thing can suck it. I’m all about the once a year timeframe. And that, do that. Once a year, yeah.

And I know you’re interested in this. The grouting worked out well as well. Never done that before either. So I’ve done two things in a year that are new or untested. That means that in 2016 I don’t have to do anything that scares me.

So there.

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